These short pieces represent my humble contribution to the long history of liturgical music. As the rituals of church have grown out of step with our times, some updating of sacraments may be in order. Wouldn't it be an improvement to replace the host (a wafer standing in for the body of Christ) with a toast or, even better, a French Toast? For penance, instead of Hail Marys just drive into the city at rush-hour. And you don't need to wait till you're dead to sample Dante's second circle of hell (called Limbo). Just call Time-Warner customer service and you'll be on hold, for eternity.

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Toothbrush concerto  4.

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